We asked a bot to write a screenplay about home printing

We had an idea to write a script about home printing for an ad, but since we dislike personal printers so much, we thought that anything we wrote would become absurd and exaggerated. 

So instead, we thought we could get a neutral party to get a fair and balanced view, without emotion or bias. That’s why we asked a bot to write a screenplay about the typical home printing experience. 

This is what it wrote. Our marketing team advised us not to film it, but we decided to share the script. 

INK – A Screenplay 
INT. BEDROOM - DAY 
A YOUNG LADY presses ‘print’ on her computer. There is exhaustion in her eyes. 
The PRINTER shivers awake. 
PRINTER 
Oh, hello, Amanda! 
The Young Lady sighs. 
YOUNG LADY 
Hello, Printer. 
PRINTER 
What are we doing? Are we printing? 
YOUNG LADY 
Yes. Yes, we are. 
PRINTER 
Can I have some ink?  
YOUNG LADY 
I gave you a new cartridge yesterday. 
PRINTER 
Yummy. Finished it.  
YOUNG LADY 
You didn’t print anything yesterday. 
PRINTER 
Oopsie. 
Silence. 
PRINTER 
Can I have some ink? 
The Young Lady pinches the bridge of her nose, then opens a desk drawer impatiently. She finds a cartridge and uses it to replace the one that’s in the Printer. 
PRINTER 
Mmmm, that’s the good stuff! 
The Young Lady looks impatiently at the Printer. 
PRINTER 
Are you OK, Amanda? Oh, the printing! 
Coming right up! 
The Printer starts to chug and print. 
PRINTER 
Oh. 
YOUNG LADY 
What is it? 
PRINTER 
Oh no. 
YOUNG LADY 
What? 
PRINTER 
I’m...I’m jamming! Hrrrrnnn! 
The paper starts to jam and crumple in the printer. 
YOUNG LADY 
Don’t do this.  
PRINTER 
			It’s too late for me. Save yourself! 
The Young Lady rolls her eyes and cancels the print job on the computer. She opens the printer and removes the jammed page. She closes the printer again. 
PRINTER 
Oh, that’s better. 
YOUNG LADY 
Can you print it now, please? 
Pause. The Young Lady stares at the Printer. 
PRINTER 
Can I have some ink? 
FADE OUT. 
Alvin Kibalama